Every once in a while, a book comes into your hands that changes your life. Sometimes, this happens quickly: one weekend, during a period of loss, I read Marilyn Robinson's novel Gilead and as the story unfolded, I realized: you are not alone in this experience. Because of her novel, I recognized grief and this helped me cope.
Sometimes, a book changes you over time, after frequent visits. For me, one such book is Michael Carroll's Awake at Work: 35 Practical Buddhist Principles for Discovering Clarity and Balance in the Midst of Work's Chaos. I've known of this book for many years - nearly a decade. My late uncle Gerald sent a copy to my mother, Susan, when she struggling with a work-related issue many years ago. Mom showed it to me back then and told me she read a "chapter" every morning, which helped her face the day with clarity, peace and wisdom. Each chapter explores one of the workplace-oriented Buddhist principles that Carroll advocates.
Years later, I lived with my parents for a while after going through a divorce. During that time, I was teaching first-year writing at a college and often struggled with the "busy-ness" of my business. I had the writing of so many students to keep track of during the day and then in the evenings I tutored, so I was often tired and overwhelmed. I picked up Mom's copy of Awake at Work. Reading it from time to time helped abate my chronic anxiety. Just the pace and tone of Carroll's writing was comforting and helped me feel better. However, I don't think I was really able to absorb and execute his principles at that time - not sure why, maybe because I hadn't yet find my true professional "medium," which would come a few years later when I certified as a therapeutic horseback riding instructor.
My first job in the EAAT field was at High Hopes Therapeutic Riding in Old Lyme, CT, a large, well-established and busy non-profit organization. I was thrilled to be working in the EAAT field and ecstatic about the opportunity at High Hopes, but I quickly found myself stressed, overwhelmed and tired. This time, I had to face that my chronic anxiety (and occasional neuroticism) was not necessarily coming from my work itself, but rather from my methods of coping (or lack thereof) with workplace stress. Teaching therapeutic riding was my dream job - an essential piece of my destiny - and I knew I needed to learn to handle the inevitable stress that comes with work. I didn't want to burn out this time.
Mom bought me my own copy of Awake at Work. I made a practice of reading a principle every day while I drank my morning coffee. I didn't meditate, though the book suggests it. I just read a principle, reflected for a moment or two, and promised to let the thought guide my day. At the time, it helped greatly and to this day, I make a practice of reading a principle in the morning during times of workplace stress (see September... this year... you win!)
After all, Equine Assisted Activities & Therapies is an amazing field where we see individuals with disabilities of all kinds reach new levels of physical, cognitive and emotional function thanks to the gifts of horses and riding. However, if there were ever a field where it is necessary to stay flexible, present and responsive to the current moment, it is EAAT! While I am not a Buddhist in any formal kind of way (and no statues decorate my desk or lawn), I recognize that you need some serious Zen in order to work as a therapeutic riding instructor. A rider may present each week with slightly different needs. Horses can be affected by the weather, their workload or changing age/ soundness. The group of workers who we depend on to help provide our service are usually volunteers, which can occasionally lead to inconsistencies. Not to mention that most EAAT centers (and all that I've affiliated with) are non-profit organizations depending on donations, fundraising and administrative creativity to function. Components like these make our work interesting and ever-changing. Staying present and responsive to the situation at hand, while remaining professional, timely and organized is an on-going challenge.
Having now taught at three therapeutic riding centers around the country, I've learned that unpredictability is inherent to the EAAT field everywhere, as is the unlimited potential to respond in the moment and create positive effects for the individuals we serve. I'm grateful for the way that teaching in EAAT has required me to develop a more present, responsive attitude towards work, teaching and life. Carroll's book has been a steady companion, an instructive friend.
One of Carroll's principles states: "Work is a mess... Many of us come to work with the hope that we can control our jobs... The reality is that there is no solution to work's inherent chaos and messiness. Work by its very nature will always be uncertain. The good news is that work's messiness and uncertainty need not be distressing. They may, in fact, be just what we are looking for." I find when I am really frustrated or stressed, it helps just to think: Work is messy. For everyone. In working with horses and riders with special needs, at least I know that I am doing work I love and believe in, messy or not! I'm grateful to Carroll's text, and to my mother and uncle for passing it along.
